I'm feeling better.  This can be because the tax season ends Friday or because I booked us a long weekend away at the end of the month or both. 

The end of the tax season most definitely doesn't mean the end of my busy work schedule but not seeing so many clients a day does help to reduce the stress level.  We are all going away for Jason's birthday at the end of the month.  He loves the place we are going to.  It's his absolute favourite place.  I even tried to bribe him into going to the sea but he would have nothing of that lol

Some things I'm doing to reduce my stress level:

• Say no
• I am trying to force myself to only think/worry about one thing at a time.  I have this thing where I have a zillion thoughts running through my mind, things that need to get done.  Now I am trying to teach myself to make notes of all the things and only concentrate on one thing at a time.
• Stop trying to force so much work into one day.  I push myself to complete whatever I'm busy with before I go home in the afternoon.  I set goals for myself and I work at it as fast as possible to get it all done in my time frame.  Which is most often only mine and not my client's. 
• Spend more time doing fun things with the boys.  It always relaxes me.  Instantly.
• Take my time nursing Zander as my time.  Where I sit back and think of nothing else but nursing him and stroking his little chubby hands.

I have an eye infection.  I wore no make-up today.  I wonder what my clients thought of me!  Well, I normally don't' wear much anyway, so maybe no-one noticed?  One can only live in hope hey!

I'm having a serious case of Monday blues today.  I've been feeling down for a while now and I'm really getting sick of it.  I'm tired of my work.  I feel totally overwelmed.  As though I'm doing something I'm not qualified to do and that I don't have near enough experience for.  Being a perfectionist (only in my work though, don't expect me to be that in all areas of my life) doesn't help.  I don't give myself a break and I will be hard on myself for a long time if I've made a mistake.  Even just a little one.

It feels as though I'm being pulled in too many directions and can't give my full attention to any one thing in my life right now.  I feel like I'm not half of the mom I used to be.  I'm not giving Tommie the attention he deserves - this is not good for our marriage.  Things are just too much.  I need to stop this world for just a little while and get of.

While I feel overwhelmed - here my sweet sweet Zander laughing at his big brother Quintus.

Sunday, July 9, 2006
 

My boys are back home.  Quintus had a marvelous time even though his team lost.  You can check some of the photos here.  They went to sleep late last night after having a late supper at a mall and taking Quintus to  play games.  Of course they had to go past the golf shop on their way home this morning.  Both of my guys are irritated and tired because of the late night last night.  Not making me the happiest of moms.  Let's just say that my husband who is sleeping his ass off in the bedroom right now, while I'm listening to the brothers fighting (due to a lack of sleep and brother-love) is not helping to make me happy.  I was hoping to get a bit of a break this afternoon to do something *I* want to do - yes okay...to blog, play with my photos, catch up on my message boards etc.

"If you don't understand how a man could both love his brother dearly and want to wring his neck at the same town, then you were probably an only child" - Linda Sunshine

Jay and I had fun.  We went to a nearby town to go play games.  MAN OH MAN do I hate those places lol  The noise level is excruciating.  After that I took him for a ice-cream (yes at the Wimpy.  Yes I had coffee)  We then met up with my folks in town, where he had a pancake, while I went home to feed Zander.  This little guy loves food.  Seriously I have never seen anything like this!  He is going to eat us out of the home before he turns a year old!

We ended up locking ourselves in our bedroom, with my big dog sleeping in the house.  She thought it was Christmas!  We watched "The Hunchback of Notre Dame" before we went to sleep.  This morning we watch "Cat in the Hat".  I've never seen either and quite enjoyed watching TV with Jay. 

This has been one long week.  I can't tell you how glad I am that it's Friday.  Weekend. 

The guys have just left to watch some or other guy test his new quad.  Leaving me in peace and quite.  Zander and I will have a lovely long bath, before heading to bed with a magazine.  I hardly slept at all last night (Jason coughed non-stop) so I want to make up for that tonight.

Tomorrow we are getting some shopping done before Tommie, Quintus and my brother heads of to Pretoria.  They will be watching the game between the Blue Bulls (Quintus' favourite team) and the Western Province (Michael's favourite team)  This will be the first rugby game that Quintus will watch live.  I'm sure he is going to have an awesome time.  They are sleeping over in Pretoria.

This leaves me, Jason and Zander.  I'm taking Jason to his favourite games centre.  We will have a picnic on the living room.  We will read lots of books and just spend some lovely quality time together.  I"m going to leave him to play with Zander.  Feed Zander, bath Zander.  It will be a great bonding time for them too.

Quintus' friend, Michael is visiting with us at the moment.  Also sleeping over tonight.  The two of them came into my office this afternoon.  Zander was sitting on my lap.  Quintus asked:  "Do you want to touch my brother, Michael?  He doesn't bite!"  ahhahahaha  Thankfully I wasn't drinking coffee at the time.  Can't like having coffee come out of nose and all.