Friday was so busy at work, and it just feels like I will never get through all the work in time.  I can't wait for my dad to get back to work on Tuesday.  We took the boys to the doctor, late afternoon.  Quintus has an ear infection (no wonder he went to sleep like that) and Jason had yet another chest/lung infection (or is it still the last one that never cleared up?)  I went back to work, with Jason.  Got their medicine and noticed that Jason has had this bad cough for over a month now.  I can't believe that this poor child must just cough like this, and no one can help him.  I'm seriously thinking of changing our to a pediatrician in Potchefstroom.

Quintus went to bed in his own room again and Jason went to sleep in his own  bed (in our room) - without me having to rock him to sleep.  They both ended up in our bed before 12 pm though :)  Sarah phoned early to say that Ian once again dropped her and the kids... was very ticked off about that, but that she was on her way to come visit us.  It was lovely seeing her after such a long time again.  We sat chatting and then went out for lunch to the Garden Pavilion.  We haven't been there in years.  Met up with Celeste and we decided to sit down and have lunch with her. I felt bad as though everyone spoke Afrikaans and I thought it was rude towards Sarah.  All the kids came home with us and the afternoon just flew by too quickly.  Jason went down for a late nap (after  5pm)  I spent some time on the computer.  Both boys again went to sleep in their own beds and I'm amazed at how easily they've accepted the change.  Especially Jason seems to have no problem with change.

We woke up after 7 am (late for us) with both boys still fast asleep in their own beds :)  We all got ready for a morning out on the golf course.  I just love riding along in the golf cart.  We had a few scares though, as Jason fell of the golf cart THREE times!!  Okay, we were going slowly, but the last time Tommie almost rode over his little leg!  It was lovely out though.  We should really do it more often.

Quintus wanted to go home with Michael, but fell asleep on the way home and Michael brought him home.  Both boys took a nap, while Tommie and I watched some tv.  Tommie made supper and bought us a hot chocolate pudding that we'll have later.  It has been a calm, family weekend.  We are thinking of going on holiday at the end of next month...we can really do with a break from the stress.

I think it is very much a part of a mother's daily life to worry about her kids.  Sometimes we worry more than other times though.  Quintus is such a very sensitive sweet boy.  For the past week, he has been complaining about not enjoying school.  Something he doesn't normally do.  When I tried to find out what the problem was earlier in the week, he said it was because he didn't have army clothes to wear like the other boys.  So my mom looked through my dad's old clothes and found his army clothes that we sent to school.  He seemed happy with that.

Then today, again he looked so unhappy when I picked him up.  He let me carry him, with his legs wrapped around my middle.  Arms tight around my neck.  I asked what was wrong, and he said that Michael (his best friend) didn't want to play with him.  That no-one wanted to play with him.  HOW do we protect our children from hurt?  Why do they have to get hurt?
I know that it is part of growing-up, but when they have such a sensitive soul, I wish I could wrap him up in cotton wool.

He fell asleep all by himself, while I came to the office to see a client. He hardly ever takes a daytime nap and definitely not on his own like that.  I will have to give lots of TLC this weekend

Just as I thought I had it all down to a tee. I was very proud of my own self last night, getting both boys to bed in their OWN beds. Quintus in his own room and Jason in a bed in our room. Well, that only lasted till 12 pm and BOTH woke up, wanting back in our beds. Of course I put them back in our beds. I suppose I'm just overly anxious to get them in their own beds now. I've only been doing this for two nights, so I'm going to relax about it, and put them to bed in their own beds again tonight.

I'm so very tired this morning though! And with being in the office by myself, I really can't handle feeling like this. Let's hope the day passes without any upsets

 

Where do I start?  I've always wanted to have a diary, but never got around to keeping one.  Thanks to some of my friends updating their's regularly, I'm more motivated to keep one now.

I've had a pretty busy week so far.  I feel like I'm being pulled in so many directions and not able to give 100 % in any place.  I can't wait until it is calmer at work again, and I can be more the devoted mom that I prefer to be.  I can't have the boys at work in the afternoon (even though my mom takes care of them) and still put in a full days work.  That's what it feels like anyway.

Things are thankfully still better between me and Tommie. He hasn't gone out drinking once, he has been trying so hard to give me more attention, help me out with the boys and change his attitude towards discipline.

I've decided that the boys need set bedtime routines.  Also that Quintus is old enough to sleep in his own bed now.  We go to his room at 8 pm, while he falls asleep I rock Jason.  It takes Jason a long time to fall asleep, but that is mostly because he is used to going to sleep long after 9 pm. Hopefully now he will sleep less during the day, as he'll get more sleep at night.

We are contemplating immigrating.  WHAT a huge decision to make. I've decided though to just put it on hold, till I have finished off my most urgent work.  This way I'll have time to actually do some research and send out my CV.

I came home from a kids birthday party and told Tommie that I wanted out.  That I've had enough.  I can't go on like this.  I can't let my kids go around thinking THIS, the life I'm living now, is right.  He cried and begged me for just ONE more chance.  Promised me that he would not mess up this chance.  That we will work on the marriage.  I understand his need to go out and asked him that if he wants to go out, it has to be with me.  That we can get someone to take the kids for a night once every two weeks, and then we can go out together.  Am I making the right decision?  I really don't know.  There are no guarantees in life.